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12:39 pm - awesome
Hahaha. Alright, so I sign online, and Nash has been on for forty minutes. I IM him, say hey, he says hi back and blocks me.
I just think it's funny that he's being such a dork. I've been trying to officially
break up with him for like two weeks now and he hasn't answered his
phone or been online or anything, just been avoiding me... so in my
mind I've been single for a couple weeks. Cause you know, how can you
dump someone you can't reach?
Apparently he felt the same way,
but he just dealt with it by pulling a disappearing act. And hell, all
I wanted to do was give him back the cds he left at my house.
Anyway,
yesterday I had blockbuster. I checked out this guy's movies toward the
end of the night and he came back a couple minutes later when I was
running tapes to get my number. Nice ego boost there.
I have so much work to do for the next two weeks I'm gonna die. Homework sucks. At least spring break is coming up, though. | | |
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11:07 pm - jesus fucking christ i hate you all
The parent-child relationship is probably one of the most poisonous
ones there is. Until the child has been out of the house for years, the
parents can not think of him as a person. They have watched him grow
into an adult but don't treat him with the same respect as they would a
stranger or a co-worker of the same age.
Likewise,
the child is guilty of having been around his parents for his entire
life and does not treat his parents as people. He does not give them
the same respect he would a stranger or a friend.
This is why
most parent-child relationships are in turmoil during the crucial
teenage years. The disarray continues into the twenties until the child
is out on his own, with his own place to live and bills to pay. Only
when the two entities are completely and unterly independent and
seperate from each other are they free to coexist peacefully.
But the strain doesn't ever really end. It is the paradox of we hurt who we love.
And I'm tired of being in the middle. I swear to fucking god, sometimes I'm the only sane person in this house. | | |
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9:59 pm - the difference between me and you is if they offered, i would do it 
So nothing ever goes right. You know?
I
got in my first accident today coming home from school. Some moron made
a left turn right in front of me on middletown-lincroft. I guess I'm
kind of a moron, too, and we were both at fault for not
quadruple-triple checking the intersection before we entered. But yeah.
Nothing major, just a couple scratches on the bumper that should come
off with compound. I'm lucky.
Still sucked though.
At
work today [Eckerd] a huge pile of empty totes fell over and knicked my
knees. The tops of both my kneecaps have huge fucking ass bruises on
them and the skin was scraped off... through my pants. Hurts like a
bitch.
My gym/health teacher is evil. She's worse than Prusak. Mr. Reid says so. She's the next Ms. Blanc I swear. Worse than, maybe?
Getting
my wisdom teeth out on Friday morning and can't smoke for a fucking
week. I'm going to die. Then I'm going to be drugged up all weekend but
not on anything fun... I'm getting extra strength tylennol or something
like that.
My boyfriend's been too busy lately with school and
work and putting out his band's cd to really talk to me. Yesterday was
the first time I saw him in like two weeks... and it was only for an
hour. Sometimes we talk on the phone at night for like five or ten
minutes... he's always stoned. I miss him.
Didn't get a
valentine's day gift... I'm not really big on it anyway but a card or
something would be nice. But I totally understand, his boss dicks him
over and he like, never gets paid ever, so he literally has no money.
When he gets the money he's taking me out on a belated vday date to any
restaurant I want. I'm thinking olive garden?
I've been striking out with the boys lately haven't I?
And
I've just been so down the past couple days. Everything's been hitting
me like ice trickling down my back and now I'm getting hypothermia.
Yeah, bad simile, but you get the point.
I don't want to do anything. At all. Ever. I'm completely hopeless and I really think I'm, uh, out of my mind.
I was supposed to banish these negative thoughts right?
Well fuck.
Get me drunk. | | |
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9:42 pm - learn to hate her
he comes on like a discordian dream,
wound tight around the fragments of my mind.
solid like the demons I have seen and
the nightmares plaguing the coils of time.
I can smile
I can smile
I can laugh and watch you go
crawl a mile
so infantile
each caress is a plead to know
but I still carve your name in ashes
still write it in the dusk
still see you when he crashes
into the arms he trusts
I'm solving riddles
little puzzles
playing tired in my head
re-repeating
re-resounding
every word you ever said
the things you took that weren't yours
well I guess I gave them all away
a sour note in a every song
and I could throw it all away
I could throw it all away
I still believe
in every sound
I could hear us
crumbling down
shut out,
turn off the light.
we almost touched
heaven again tonight. | | |
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12:47 pm - i feel pretty <3
patooteepoo (12:41:16 AM): so yeah
patooteepoo (12:41:22 AM): i had blockbuster tonight
patooteepoo (12:41:40 AM): and this one guy came in, kinda cute, had that hat you always wear in tan
patooteepoo (12:42:03 AM): and got like six movies... made small talk with me, asked my name and such
patooteepoo (12:42:18 AM): i told him he should see stargate cause he was getting star trek movies
patooteepoo (12:42:26 AM): he leaves, comes back like an hour later
Ragnar Dnath (12:42:31 AM): gets stargate?
patooteepoo (12:42:36 AM): gets the stargate movie... waits for my computer to be free
patooteepoo (12:42:36 AM): yeah
patooteepoo (12:42:43 AM): it was cute
Ragnar Dnath (12:42:46 AM): damn kate
Ragnar Dnath (12:42:51 AM): I wish I had that affect on girls
patooteepoo (12:43:04 AM): he wanted to know what i was doing for valentine's day but didnt take it further than that
patooteepoo (12:43:19 AM): well he said he was taking out his friends wife cause her husband's in iraq
patooteepoo (12:43:20 AM): which means
patooteepoo (12:43:25 AM): he was really telling me he was single | | |
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